I took mom and dad to the doctor today. These things are never uncomplicated. The doc is conscientious, asks a lot of good questions, and refers us every time to other doctors, requiring hours of patient waiting, and tests to arrange for, and medication to pick up. Today I helped mom and then dad disrobe so the doctor could look at a rash on my father's legs and back and refer him to a dermatologist and my mom could have a chest x-ray, a follow up to her bronchitus that isn't going away.
She eats nothing but chocolate and meat, believing that food has all begun tasting bad because of the massive incompetence of everyone but her. She cannot cook anymore; hence, she cannot eat. She won't eat vegetables because she heard some months ago (and I'm sure doesn't even remember that anymore) about the salmonella outbreak and fears all green things might make her sick. She won't eat tomatoes either, for good measure, but does eat fruit sometimes, it's true.
I was trying to grade a last few papers, pretty sad specimens, but didn't get in more than one half-hearted essay before I had to stop and help my parents dress and get ready to go, ride the elevator, find the car, and drive on home. It was 6:30 by the time I got home. No one had made dinner. Luckily, I was able to call Jeremy and ask him to feed the poor cats, though.
Sigh. I guess I can check another appointment off the list, at least.
4 comments:
Maybe the kindest thing to do--for your parents and for yourself--is to let them do as they want. If she wants to eat chocolate, eat chocolate. It took me a long while to realize that I was trying to keep my parents alive, when actually, they were dying. And having these last simple wishes--for chocolate or, in my father's case, a pocketful of napkins--seems so easy. I send you strength.
Lou,
Thank you for the strength. I can use it. Just got a letter from Social Security demanding a complete accounting on what we spent on everything since Dec.2006. Luckily, I did one on medical expenses and transportation recently for Veterans (nearly killed me); now I will put all of it on the computer and next time it will be easier.
As they say, that which doesn't kill me makes me strong.
By the way, I'm letting my mom eat as much chocolate as she wants. You are right that dying is inevitable. I don't take them to the doctor nearly as much these days as I used to, though it might seem like it.
Linda,
I don't know what happened to your post. I'll find it and publish it. Thanks so much for the complement. It means a lot to me that you feel that way. You know yourself that one doesn't ask "What is in it for me?" before helping those who are helpless, whether they are people or rescue animals. You live that credo every day of your life.
Yes. Buy her some delicious chocolate! If chocolate makes her happy BUY IT!!!!!
Beth
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