Monday, December 28, 2009

The owner of the new place

I met the owner of the new Board and Care. We were supposed to meet at 11, and so I was a bit put off when I got there and not only was he not there, but had gone shopping and wouldn't be there for another half an hour. I chatted with the main caregiver, who was very nice though she asked a lot of questions.
After a while, the owner arrived. He was a florid, red haired man, maybe about 35, with a nascent pot belly, wearing a clean white shirt and low slung pants of the kind much older men wear, with the stretch waistband. His eyes were pale, slightly faded blue. I heard right away that he had an accent, southern I thought, and asked him where he was from. It turns out he was from Virginia, not far from where Richard's parents live. He was surprised to learn that Richard and his family hail from that area, and that I went to school there too.
He spent a long time talking, speaking very frankly about himself and why he went into this business and why he bought this particular place. Though he is a lawyer, he is not a sharpie.
My parents' caregiver says there are many violations of code in the new house, and she will help him change those things so he won't get in trouble with the state licensing board.
So I told him all about my parents and the terms of our living there and he accepted them. I did not hold back all the difficult things about my parents and asked that the place make an exception for them, getting them washed and dressed at 5:00 or 6:00 AM, whenever they wanted to get up, while most of the time, people have to wait until 7 AM to get washed if they need help.
It was important to my father that he have this modicum of control over his life. He has been an early riser all his life, and he wants to go on being one. The owner says that their caregiver can get them up herself, and she expects to do so.
I think this is going to work, though he admits that we will probably have to move out of the big room if someone with much more money to offer asks to live there. There are lots of empty double rooms with private bathrooms. I think it will work out.

6 comments:

Lou said...

It will work out, you are absolutely right. I found that when a new caretaker came on board, I talked them through, then left them alone with Mom or Dad, and they made a relationship.

Robbi said...

That has generally been the case, but it may be hard for mom to adjust. She did not particularly want to leave the old place at all, not understanding why we were anxious to go. But we can't go by her preferences. She isn't able to think clearly anymore, so we must care for her as one would a child.

Lou said...

You are exactly right about your mom. When will the move happen?

Robbi said...

I gave two weeks notice as of yesterday. We don't really have to give any notice at all, but I gave him this much. It gives me time to call everyone I need to call anyhow.

marly said...

Good work, Robinka. That will be a relief.

Robbi said...

The owner is still finagling, and threatening the caregiver who has looked after my parents for so long, waiting up all night when my dad is in the emergency room and ordering the medications for us from the VA. She kept tabs on everything, and I trusted her utterly. I don't have anywhere near the faith that the owner and his wife can care for them in that way.
The owner offered us a lower rent and more perks, counter to the agreement they tried to get us to sign, which was the reason I went and looked at the new place to begin with.
He assures me that they will do as good a job as Suzie has, but I don't think they can. They just aren't going to be there, and the people who are there may not be at all trustworthy, especially given my father's temper and very complicated medications.
Of course, the new place may not be as good as it seems, it may not give us everything this place gives us, but we can come back if we want to.