Tuesday, May 18, 2010


Yesterday my mother had her appointment. The bus arrived as ordered, and though the driver claimed that they had no record of my mother being in a wheelchair, despite my mad dash on Friday to measure and weigh the thing and call it in to OCTA (by then closed, so it was left admittedly on an answering machine), the company apparently did not have this information. Also, I had completely forgotten to get my poor chilly mother a coat from the house. After she broke her leg, she could not wear any of her clothes because they were all pants that hugged her legs too much, and this wasn't possible because of the leg stabilizer. There was only one pair of loose, lightweight, flowing pants, so I madly dashed to the store last week and bought about 5 dresses and pairs of shorts. In fact, I have another in my car, but she is always cold, and the caregiver did not pack sweaters or long sleeve tops because she was sure they would put her in a gown, and she said things are always stolen from those places anyway. She has only one longsleeve nightgown, so they dress her in it and the pants every day.
She was outside waiting and waiting on the ride home for the bus 45 minutes, freezing.
I don't know what to do. I don't have time to shop. I worried myself sleepless over it all night long.


Robin said...

Your poor mother! I hate to think of her in that nursing home with only a gown and a pair of shorts to wear. I am deeply saddened to hear that the residents clothes are regularly stolen, by staff members, I assume. I have heard so many horror stories about nursing homes. My mother was about to send my grandmother to one that supposedly had very high ratings. But within a week she yanked her out of there (her stuff had been stolen, too, I believe) and cared for my grandmother herself in a hospice arrangement in her home. She was a former nurse, herself, and that must have made it easier, but she had to have a regular nurse come in every day to assist.

There are no easy answers here, and I only hope that this place is better than most. I know you will be watching them as much as you can. I would imagine the staff would behave better if they knew relatives are keeping close tabs on them. Then again, I know so little about it. There are good and compassionate caretakers in nursing homes, and I hope and pray your mother is with them now.

Robbi said...

You are right. Despite the attractive furnishings and the many staff, most of whom call me on the phone all day long and collar me in the halls when I am there, I think she receives MUCH better care at home at the board and care. I don't think she is better off here at all, where she will not eat or take her medication. She told me today that everything tastes "bitter" to her--the orange juice, the pureed peaches, etc. I spoke with the speech therapist, and she is going to give her a real sandwich (soft) this evening, and a real cup of tea. I hope this works out, as otherwise, I will have to insist on taking her home.